So last month with different things to do with the house and landscaping Hubby was calling me often at work asking me to move money here and there across different accounts so we could pay for things. Apparently whilst doing this one day I must have accidentally clicked the print icon and printed the screen I was on. Because I did not realise I had done this I didn’t go looking for the piece of paper.
Normally if someone finds printing on the printer that does not belong to them they put it to the side or if they know the owner they deliver it to them. But no…
Someone found this statement which had my name in bold letters at the top of the page, a list of all 5 of my accounts and their names (meaning mine and Hubby’s) (including our mortgage account) and instead of handing it to me or leaving it to the side of the printer they took it and put it on the notice board in the staffroom. Front and center for all to see my financials. Including recent transactions which showed my pay coming in too, so now everyone knows that. Let me be clear in stating that there is no way any team member would have thought this was the place to put lost print outs. It is 3 rooms away from the printer.
Two team members noticed it yesterday morning and ripped it down for me.
What an awful, malicious thing to do. What a dick!!! Management is furious, but completely impotent in this matter because we don’t know who did it, we’ll never find out unless they decide to continue whatever this BS is against me and escalate things.
I don’t get it though. I am not mean to anyone. Even when I stand up for myself or someone else I am not mean about it. This is awful. How dare someone expose such private information about me. Plus, why??? What could they possibly get out of it? There was nothing in the accounts. Are you trying to shame me because I am poor? I don’t understand! So weird!!!
There are only one or two women at work that are malicious enough to do something like this so I am pretty sure I know who it is. She won’t make eye contact with me and twice today I have walked towards her and when she has seen me she has changed direction. Then we went out for a staff luncheon and I made sure I sat next to her. She put her bag inbetween us and moved away angling herself away from me and did everything she could to avoid conversation with me without appearing rude. She has been fine with everyone else so I am pretty sure she was the one who did it.
Do you guys think this is the beginning of something and I need to look out for myself or just a one of heinous act?
August 17th, 2016 at 5:56 pm
What a horrible thing to do! And I’m sorry (and totally understand) that it’s left you feeling unsafe. In terms of what next, I think keep it in the day. People have leapt to help you and if your management team are vocally angry, this person can see that they have crossed a line. Keep your dignity and usual warmth and know that you are supported by all but this one bad apple. xx
August 18th, 2016 at 10:43 am
So horrible. Thanks. Not so much unsafe, hurt of course, so mad and it’s hard to put a finger on it, but kind of disgusted/shocked/amazed/horrified that there is someone in our office that is like this. We have since figured out that they kept this statement for at least a couple of weeks before putting it on the board. Crazy town!!! What were they doing with it all that time?
In consultation with management we have actually decided to ignore it, but we wary of possible escalation. They have indicated (without saying anything) that they are thinking along the same track as me as far as the culprit is concerned. This person thrives on attention and causing sh*t so we are going to completely ignore it. We can’t prove she did it so going at her will give us nothing. So we are going to deny her the drama she craves. If it makes her do something bigger then we will be watching for it. Sorry for the long reply π
August 18th, 2016 at 1:33 pm
A few weeks?!?!?!?! So calculated!!!
August 19th, 2016 at 5:55 pm
I know right?! That was the part that kinda scared me. WTF were they doing with it all that time? Are their more copies?
August 17th, 2016 at 7:19 pm
Far out. What is wrong with some people. That is just awful and I am so sorry something has happened to make you feel vulnerable at work where you should feel safe. I like the advice of the commenter above so going to second that.
August 18th, 2016 at 11:00 am
I don’t know. I don’t understand how some peoples minds work. Yes it was a violation of privacy, but it didn’t really have the response in me I think she was after. I think she wanted tears and upset and what she got was raging mad in an office which she didn’t even get to experience. Perhaps she thought I was a different kind of person… I just don’t know.
We have gone a bit of a different way (outlined in the response to the above commenter) because of the personality of the person we think was involved and what we believe she was hoping to get out of it. We basically aren’t even going to mention it and whenever we do where someone might overhear we speak of the perpetrator in language like “someone must have been really desperate for attention or drama to do something like that” and “what a sad little lonely person” or “how childish can you be? I feel like I am in primary school again”. The person we think did it would hate to be thought of that way so we are hoping it will manage her behaviour a bit.
August 18th, 2016 at 1:32 pm
Nice tactics!
August 17th, 2016 at 10:33 pm
Why???? I don’t get why someone would do that? I am so sorry. And then it seems that she made it VERY obvious that it was her. Does management know that you feel it was likely her? It sounds like they are very upset as well and would probably like any information. But like you said exactly, what a dick!
August 19th, 2016 at 5:39 pm
I don’t know. It is senseless and stupid.
I think she believes she is cunning. Her behaviour shifts so often that it is very possible that this could be her behaviour from some perceived slight on my part.
August 17th, 2016 at 10:58 pm
What a spiteful thing to do! I’m so sorry this happened to you. The only gain your mystery enemy could possibly get from doing this is some kind of twisted satisfaction of knowing she embarrassed you. Since she accomplished her mission, in order to show her that she didn’t get to you (even if she did embarrass you, only *you* know that truth so don’t give yourself away!), I suggest killing her with kindness. Like, extreme overload. She won’t be expecting that and won’t know what to make of it, and that will probably kill any future malicious plans in the bud.
August 19th, 2016 at 5:50 pm
That’s what I thought as well.
I have done the kill her with kindness thing in the past. This would totally be my usual reaction, but there is a lot of other stresses going on at present so to be honest I don’t have the energy to even bother with her anymore than I already have. I’m not in her section and don’t have much to do with her so whenever I pass her I just do nothing. I am not shying away from her and I will be the first to initiate eye contact, but I don’t initiate any conversation with her. She’s been causing trouble for other supervisors this week too so I just don’t feel like she is worth any effort for me π
August 17th, 2016 at 11:05 pm
Wow, what a horrible and mean thing to do!!! I am absolutely disgusted at what some people will do in a deliberate attempt to hurt another person. I’m so sorry you took the brunt of her cruelty.
August 19th, 2016 at 5:51 pm
I know! Me too!
Thank you. I suppose better me than someone who couldn’t brush it off, but still shouldn’t happen. People can be so awful!
August 18th, 2016 at 1:12 am
Omg that’s such a horribly rude and spiteful thing to do. I really do not understand some people at all. I’m really sorry that happened. Hopefully this was just a one-time thing and you won’t have to continue to deal with petty high school behavior.
August 19th, 2016 at 5:52 pm
Thank you. Oh man I hope so too. I don’t have the time or energy to deal with this kind of f-ery. π
August 18th, 2016 at 2:09 am
God that’s so awful, I can’t understand how someone could be so nasty! I hope it isn’t the start of something. That colleague sounds horrible.
August 19th, 2016 at 5:55 pm
Yeah, I don’t understand her. It possibly wasn’t her, but it is the way her mind works and it says something that she was the first suspect for management as well. She’s a strange person.
I don’t understand how someone could do it either, so awful. I am letting it go now as best I can though. I am actually happy that I cannot fathom the reason someone would do it or what they would hope to get out of it because to me that means I am not on their level π
August 18th, 2016 at 3:22 am
What a terrible thing to go through. I am sorry you were put in such a strange and vulnerable position. But here is my advice to you–try to completely let it go. This act by someone else is a reflection of them and has nothing to do with you. The best thing you can do for your mental health and well being is acknowledge it was hurtful and maybe made you angry but no huge harm was done, recognize whomever did it is battling their own demons that have nothing to do with you and let it go. Don’t try to understand or even place blame. I know this is easier said than done but my best advice to you :). Xo
August 19th, 2016 at 5:53 pm
Thank you. Great advice and this is basically what I am doing. Mostly I just don’t have the energy at the moment and there are enough other stresses happening at work already so I am kind of hitting delete on this incident. Management knows, that’s important… move on.
November 27th, 2016 at 9:26 pm
Oh. My. Gawd! How awful.
I’ve obviously been trapped under the girls and missed too much blog reading. I don’t know what to say except try to ignore it or challenge her in an appropriate way. I always think to myself “I can sleep at night because I did the right thing”. People like that, I bet they don’t sleep x
November 29th, 2016 at 1:12 pm
I ended up ignoring it which I think bothered her more. She seems to love the drama and just be a sad person who likes to try and make others as sad as she is.
I like your thinking on the sleeping thing. π